1 Peter 3: 3 – 6 “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair or gold jewelry or fine clothes, but from the inner disposition of your heart, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in God’s sight. For this is how the holy women of the past adorned themselves. They put their hope in God and were subject to their husbands, just as Sarah obeyed Abraham and called him lord. And you are her children if you do what is right and refuse to quiver in fear.”
Everybody in Hollywood knew that Marilyn Monroe was a glamour girl! In an day when celebrity photos were circulated as pin – up girls, Monroe was one of the most popular. Scarcely a day went by when Marilyn’s photo wasn’t gracing the pages of some fan magazine. Marilyn Monroe was friends with all kinds of A – List people, including President John Kennedy. Yes, Marilyn Monroe appeared to have it all….the blond hair, the gorgeous figure, fantastic clothes and all the jewelry anybody could wish for. Marilyn Monroe was a S*T*A*R* and girls wanted to copy her… right up until she committed suicide by taking a drug overdose. Eventually it came out that Marilyn had been unhappy her entire life, and that all this wealth and fame had not helped her cope with her problems.
There were glamour girls in Peter’s day. Read Isaiah or Jeremiah and you will see descriptions of young ladies with gold earrings, nose rings, ankle bracelets and arm bracelets, not to mention silken veils and clothing spun of precious materials. Some young ladies even wore ankle bracelets that were chained together by a golden chain so that their steps would be small, forcing them to walk with a mincing gait. Some of these ankle bracelets also had little bells that would tinkle enticingly as the lady walked. And these young ladies had perfumes and cosmetics. It was very common to apply kohl around the eyes of small girls – a practice that continues in Africa today. There were other cosmetics as well. And when these glamour girls got saved, they came to church in all their finery with their hair carefully braided, perhaps with golden combs with jewels set in them adorning their hair.
Imagine trying to keep a prayer meeting going once one of these gorgeously arrayed young women would show up! Every man in the place would be checking this girl out while the women would also be checking her out and becoming furious at such effrontery! And the ladies who were not furious would be eating their hearts out because they couldn’t afford that finery.
In an earlier age, there was a saying “Handsome is as handsome does.” Appearances can be deceiving, just as they were in the case of Marilyn Monroe. We have a lady friend who is one of the most loving and joyful people I know. This lady and her husband belong to a religious group that encourages extreme modesty in dress for women, so our friend wears long skirts and a head covering at all times. But to spend a few minutes in our friend’s company is to feel love and encouragement and to feel safe in her presence. At that point, you don’t care about our friend’s clothing because you are so encouraged by her spirit.
When my husband was working for an ambulance service in Memphis, TN, he became friends with a lady who lived in a nursing home. Although this lady was only in her early thirties, her body was so twisted with rheumatoid arthritis that she needed skilled nursing care. She could not walk but had to get around in a wheel chair. But once you met this lady, you forgot the wheelchair and the twisted body! This lady had a buoyant spirit that was a constant encouragement to others. She spent her days acting as the self – appointed mail deliverer at the nursing home. She was a favorite with all the nurses, and the day she died, her funeral was crowded with relatives of those whom she had encouraged.
Here Peter is not demanding that women dress in the ugliest garments they can find. That would be ridiculous. But Peter is encouraging ladies to realize that true beauty comes from the heart.
“Fine!” you say. “But what’s this bit about Sarah and Abraham and Sarah calling Abraham her lord? Are you saying that I have to go home to my husband who is sitting in his recliner drinking a beer and call him ’lord?’ You must be nuts!”
No, that’s not the point. But look at these verses again: “They put their hope in God and were subject to their husbands, just as Sarah obeyed Abraham and called him lord. And you are her children if you do what is right and refuse to quiver in fear.”
1. Wives are to put their hope in God. How many of us have long since realized that demanding that our spouses make us happy is ridiculous? If you put your hopes in any other human being, no matter how wonderful, eventually they will disappoint you. God is the only perfect Being and the only Being who never changes. Placing your hope in your spouse is only going to lead to disappointment and discouragement for you and for frustration for your spouse. Put your hope in God.
2. Wives are to be subject to their husbands, not subservient but acknowledging that there is a chain of command in the household. See yesterday’s discussion; only equals can subject themselves to other equals. But refusal to come under authority leads to rebellion, and before you realize it, your children will be rebelling against you. Spiritual decisions echo throughout entire familes. Sarah called Abraham “lord” because that was the social convention in that day and age. What’s important is a heart attitude of respect.
3. “Do what is right and refuse to quiver in fear” Nobody should have to live in fear, particularly in their own home. You are to follow the Lord and behave as His follower; at the same time, if you feel that you are being forced to “quiver in fear” in your own home, GET OUT NOW!!! Don’t wait! Don’t insist that your husband only tripped when he hit you in the face and that you were clumsy when he pushed you down the stairs and you broke your right arm. One time I sat as my uncle described watching his grandmother become so agitated when she saw her father – in – law coming that if she was holding a stack of plates, the plates would begin rattling because she was shaking so hard. Evidently that man was a rage – aholic who controlled people by his anger. Sadly, there was nobody to tell my great grandmother to get out of the situation to a safe place.
Want to be handsome or beautiful? Cultivate a loving gentle spirit. Soak your mind and heart in the Word of God. Refuse to obsess on ugliness. This does not mean you ignore terrible current events, but you need to ask God to give you His Mind about them.
PRAYER: Father God, help all who read this to be encouraged that true beauty is within the reach of all of us and that it is not a matter of being born with a beautiful face or body. Lord, comfort and encourage those who have been called horrible names and have been insulted that they were plain or ugly. You know that in your creation, nothing is plain or ugly unless sin makes it so. Help all who read this to come to you so that you can change their minds and hearts and make them beautiful right where they are. In the matchless Name of King Jesus. Amen.
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