DECEMBER 29, 2021 PUTTING YOUR LIFE ON A SOLID FOUNDATION 77: DIVORCE AND MARRIAGE – VOWS THAT STICK LIKE GLUE!
Deuteronomy 24:1 – 5 “If a man marries a woman, but she becomes displeasing to him because he finds some indecency in her, he may write her a certificate of divorce, hand it to her, and send her away from his house. If, after leaving his house, she goes and becomes another man’s wife, and the second man hates her, writes her a certificate of divorce, hands it to her, and sends her away from his house, or if he dies, the husband who divorced her first may not marry her again after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination to the LORD. You must not bring sin upon the land that the LORD your God is giving you as an inheritance.
If a man is newly married, he must not be sent to war or be pressed into any duty. For one year he is free to stay at home and bring joy to the wife he has married.”
From the very beginning, God always intended that marriages should last. It was for this reason that restrictions on divorce were so demanding. A husband could not merely wake up some morning and declare that he was divorcing his wife; he had to find some uncleanness – generally sexual misconduct – or some other compelling reason for the divorce. And even then there were legalities that had to be satisfied for a divorce to take place.
Notice the progression: if the first husband divorced the wife, she could remarry. If the second husband also divorced the wife or died, she could not remarry the first husband. But this law says nothing against the woman marrying a third and different man. Women without husbands found themselves in very precarious positions with nobody to protect them.
The orders in verse 5 are among the most endearing in the Old Testament. God wants newlyweds to spend their first year together so that their relationship might have a firm foundation. Those first months are critically important to any marriage because that is the time period when the rules by which the marriage will function are hammered out.
APPLICATION: Divorce! There are few uglier situations than the breakup of a marriage, assuming the two partners have entered into it for the long term and not with their fingers crossed. There is now a satellite TV program on which couples are married at their first meeting. One wonders how long these couples will remain married. Even in states that have “no fault divorce” laws, the breakup of a marriage is incredibly painful and does severe damage to both the spouses and to any children involved. A divorce is worse than a death; at least with a death, you can bury a body and have a funeral.
Traditionally arranged marriages have been the rule in many cultures. Depending on how the marriages are arranged and who arranges them, this practice may be very positive or very harmful.
For years we have worked with a tribe in which traditional marriages consisted of a man paying bride price to a family when a baby girl was born and then marrying the girl when she came of age. Families would trade the right to marry baby girls; men from family A would pay bride corn to marry the baby girls from family B, and vice versa. This tradition has led to numerous disasters, including suicide by the girls forced into loveless marriages with older men. Thankfully, this custom is becoming obsolete; however, it may still be practiced in remote villages.
What about the one – year restriction regarding newly weds? It takes at least a year for most couples to sort out money, jobs, duties at home, etc. Sometimes people feel that living together without a marriage ceremony should be just as valid as a marriage; however, there are major differences. For one thing, a relationship without a marriage allows either partner to bail out whenever things get tough, something that should not happen in a good marriage.
The traditional marriage vows include the words ““I, _____, take thee, _____, to be my wedded wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my faith.” If the two individuals reciting these vows really mean them, these vows will be the glue that holds them together when things get tough. Lacking that glue, one member of a couple may simply leave when the pressure is on.
God loves marriages and those who enter into them. God wants couples to come together and to stay together so that when hard times come, they will be able to support each other and to shelter any children they have together. Is making a good marriage work simple? Far from it! Is it worth it? Absolutely!
PRAYER: Father God, thank You for loving us and for caring for us. Help us to value our spouses and our marriage relationships as much as You do. Let the marriages of everyone who reads this devotional be blessed places of refuge. In the matchless Name of King Jesus. Amen.
Burunche's Blog 
December 30, 2021 at 12:04 am
Really good