Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”
Today is the first Sunday in Advent, the day we specially begin preparing our hearts and minds for Christmas. Last Friday was Black Friday, so-called because of the crowds and the chaos of millions of shoppers competing for bargains. Now it’s time for a heart-check: if you shopped in stores on Black Friday, how kind were you? When you saw the last one of the items you desired, did you push and shove to get it, perhaps throwing an elbow in someone else’s face? Why did you want that item or those items? Were you buying Christmas presents, and if so, did your behavior on Black Friday honor Christ?
Sadly, many of us commit countless little murders throughout our days. Rather than being kind, we settle for snide remarks, back-biting, and cutting, even with those whom we claim to love. When I was growing up, I had relatives who could reduce those around them to emotional rubble with a single comment accompanied by a raised eyebrow. Unfortunately, as a small child, I quickly copied that behavior, only to be questioned as to WHY I could possibly behave that way. Looking back, I can think of several reasons for such behavior; however, it is extremely destructive and has no place in the life of a believer.
Some of my family members emphasized being “nice;” however, niceness and kindness are two totally different things. The same relatives who made cutting remarks felt that they were being nice, but I can tell you from personal experience that they were anything but kind. And these people also felt that as long as they were being nice and socially acceptable, nobody should criticize them. After all, they weren’t doing anything wrong…except for breaking hearts.
The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines kind-hearted as “A kind-hearted person is one who likes other people a lot and always wants to help them.” Other signs of kindness are people who are friendly, generous, and considerate. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 tells us, “Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
Although these verses describe love, they are also describing kindness, for kind people will be patient, long-suffering, refusing to envy or parade themselves or behave rudely or seek their own good before anyone else’s. Kind people remain unprovoked, do not think evil about others, do not rejoice when others behave badly but rejoice in the truth. Kind people also will bear all things, believe all things, hope all things, and endure all things. Love and kindness are inextricably bound together. One cannot be loving without being kind and one cannot be kind without being loving.
These days, we have all kinds of apps on our smart phones for monitoring things. We can monitor our pulse, our blood pressure, our blood sugar, and the results of exercise programs. Given the right tablet and the right probe, we can perform ultrasounds. But one app you’ll never find on a smart phone is a kindness app. Oh, you can chart your good deeds on a smart phone; however, no smart phone has ever been invented that will analyze your spiritual state. For that kind of analysis, we must turn to God.
As we prepare for Christmas, let us prepare spiritually as well as physically. Pray over your family members and friends and ask God to show you where you have hurt them and how you can make amends. If apologies are needed, apologize. If you have neglected someone because you were too busy, find ways to include them in your life.
When my mother married my father, she didn’t realize the complications of marrying an only child of an energetic mother. Mothers of only children are generally sure that NOBODY is good enough for their child. My grandmother expected Dad to marry a nice Swedish American girl from our community; instead, he met Mom at college, marrying someone who was Welsh/German/Irish/Scot. To make matters worse, my father’s mother was a Carlson, and those Carlsons could work just about anyone else into the ground; meanwhile, my poor mother was quite ill for the first thirteen years of their marriage. My mother’s poor health gave my grandmother the opportunity to repeatedly demonstrate that my mother was a slacker who wasn’t doing enough for her family. (WRONG! Mom did a lot, but she had three children while Grandma had had only one.) But when my mother succeeded in addressing her problems with several allergies and became healthy, she began having coffee with my grandmother every Friday afternoon. Those Friday coffee times became so precious to my grandmother that when my mother died at the age of 58, my grandmother grieved for months afterwards.
What changed my grandmother’s heart? It was my mother’s kindness. My brave mother deliberately began an unusual act of kindness AND THEN REPEATED IT FOR YEARS. True kindness cannot be a one-off thing as the Brits would say. Kindness is not only loving but persistent.
This Christmas, why not consider acts of kindness as Christmas presents? You might spend a little time and a little money, but you never know how much those acts of kindness will mean to the recipients. If you have trouble being kind to someone, ask God for help.
PRAYER: Father God, thank You for loving us and for caring for us. Lord, help us to be kind to all those around us, particularly to those who are difficult to love. Thank You that You have promised to send Your Holy Spirit to guide us and to empower us. In the mighty and precious Name of King Jesus. Amen.
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