Psalm 39 I said, “I will guard my ways,
Lest I sin with my tongue;
I will restrain my mouth with a muzzle,
While the wicked are before me.”
2 I was mute with silence,
I held my peace even from good;
And my sorrow was stirred up.
It was one of the most trying experiences of my career. I thought I was only a part of a delegation at the chief’s palace to support a hospital leader who had been accused of something. Instead, I found myself a target in five public meetings. Suddenly, community leaders were accusing me of causing problems in the very institution my husband and I had worked in and supported through donations for twenty-five years. I was given no opportunity to defend myself, and the charges were both specious and ridiculous. As I sat in those meetings, I consciously strove to force my body into a relaxed posture and to smile, giving the impression that these scathing remarks weren’t touching me. Only after the meetings finished did I return home, relax, and begin asking the Lord what was happening. Eventually, I realized that these attacks were part of an orchestrated campaign to remove as many forthright and honest leaders in the hospital as possible. Blessedly, God preserved us and continues to do so.
3 My heart was hot within me;
While I was musing, the fire burned.
Then I spoke with my tongue:
4 “Lord, make me to know my end,
And what is the measure of my days,
That I may know how frail I am.
5 Indeed, You have made my days as handbreadths,
And my age is as nothing before You;
Certainly every man at his best state is but vapor. Selah
There’s nothing like repeatedly facing false accusations and lies spewed forth by the very people you have served for decades to cause your heart to burn. And I have never had any doubts as to my frailty. “Time keeps on slippin’, slippin’, slippin’ into the future.” Years ago, the Steve Miller band popularized a song with this chorus. The shocking thing about aging is how fast time rushes away from you. One day, you are young and strong, certain that you will continue to walk into a bright future for the rest of your life. The next day, forty years have passed and your joints remind you of their existence each time you get up from a chair. Sure, you’re “vapor;” you’re just NOISY vapor!
6 Surely every man walks about like a shadow;
Surely they busy themselves in vain;
He heaps up riches,
And does not know who will gather them.
7 “And now, Lord, what do I wait for?
My hope is in You.
Face it, folks, our only secure hope is the Lord. When Bernie Madoff’s Ponzi scheme collapsed in 2008, it sent shock waves throughout the world. Many small investors had trusted Madoff’s company with their retirement savings, and the fall of his empire forced many retirees back into the work force simply to survive. Since the collapse of Madoff’s investment house and his 2009 guilty plea, the Madoff Victim Fund has paid more than $4 billion to nearly 41,000 victims in 127 countries. While the final payoffs were made in 2024, the dimensions of the social havoc already incurred were incalculable.
8 Deliver me from all my transgressions;
Do not make me the reproach of the foolish.
9 I was mute, I did not open my mouth,
Because it was You who did it.
10 Remove Your plague from me;
I am consumed by the blow of Your hand.
11 When with rebukes You correct man for iniquity,
You make his beauty melt away like a moth;
Surely every man is vapor. Selah
Decades ago, I read a book entitled “Will Jesus Return Before My Body Parts Go South.” At the time, I thought that was merely a clever title. Now I know that gravity is not the friend of the elderly, and that yes, eventually every bit of my body is likely to go south unless I keep exercising. Take those selfies quickly if you are addicted to admiring your own face!
12 “Hear my prayer, O Lord,
And give ear to my cry;
Do not be silent at my tears;
For I am a stranger with You,
A sojourner, as all my fathers were.
13 Remove Your gaze from me, that I may regain strength,
Before I go away and am no more.”
This psalmist can’t seem to make up his mind. First, he begs God to remember him and to help him. Then as he is begging for help, he also begs God to “remove Your gaze from me,” as if God is the Source of his troubles. While it’s true that we might be struck speechless and weak in the presence of God’s pure holiness, it’s equally true that God knows how weak we are and He can give us the strength to continue His work. When Isaiah saw the Lord in the temple, he was stricken with the knowledge of his own unworthiness until God sent a cherub with a flaming coal to cleanse his lips and his heart. But that was the start of a new and magnificent ministry for Isaiah. We are far better off feeling helpless and weak in God’s presence than we are feeling as if we can handle everything ourselves, for considering ourselves to be self-made people is a delusion that can bring disaster.
May God help us to wait on Him, knowing that He is far more than sufficient to handle all our problems. We are far safer being weaker in the presence of God than we are by feeling strong in ourselves.
PRAYER: Father God, thank You for loving us and caring for us. Lord, help us to trust You and wait for Your provision, Your strength, and Your enabling. In the mighty and precious Name of King Jesus. Amen.
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